I'm losing it :(

I've spent all day today looking for my car keys, I'm pretty bummed because on Sunday I lost $20 at the Farmers Market... I don't know why I keep losing stuff....

Yesterday, I went grocery shopping for James's birthday breakfast with Sora. I came home and put her in the family room with my keys (thats how I remember it) and spent almost two hours making breakfast. WHY did it take me so long?! Well, as I started cooking, then she wanted to eat. More cooking, she got super fussy....poop diaper change. More cooking, screaming baby...Grandpa steps in to entertain her. At least shopping was easy...I didn't even make anything fancy....eggs, bacon, sausage and hash browns *sigh*

So back to today. Everyone is eyeing me like a crazy person, making crappy remarks because I can't remember crap and looking everywhere....and the one person who probably knows the most can only say one syllable over and over. I know they think I locked my keys in the car, I know I haven't but I'm not so sure. I've only locked my keys in the car once, I was 16 and a new driver, but never again. My sister has a spare, so I drive to her work, pick it up and come back home. Go out to my car, turn the key and open the door. The alarm goes off. My alarm isn't a rinky-dink alarm, its the Tyrannosaurus Rex of alarms, if you had a pace maker, I'd probably make yours skip and you'd die.

Nope. Keys not inside.


to be cont....

update

UGH! is all I can say about the past couple of weeks. I haven't had a chance to post anything because Sora keeps me extremely busy. She started crawling, it didn't take her too long to figure the coordination factor of crawling. She's babbling 'da-da'. Pulling herself up. Shes climbing up stairs (omg!) she can do the three in the family room, and finds the second set and can do 5 more. I'll let her climb, but I have to be next to her to catch her. She gets into EVERYTHING! she likes playing with cords! We've also started feeding her solids, its going ok. She's not really into it, but will take 3 baby spoonfuls at least. She has her own highchair and sits with us when we have dinner.

She was also teething again. I guess it comes in spurts, the hard part about teething was how uncomfortable she gets. She wakes several times in the middle of the night screaming, once she found my nipple and started to nurse WHILE I was sleeping! That was an odd experience...When she was awake she was in pain and needed a lot of attention. She also had the runs. This week she seems a lot better, she isn't cranky and can play by herself for at least 45 mins.

We went to the dog park with Auntie Stephy, Sora was on my hip, I don't know how she did this but, she 'jumped' off and I caught her by her ankle before she hit the ground! shes dangerous even in my arms!

I'm leaving her with other people now, which is a nice break for me. I got a small 10 hr a week part time job. James watched her one day and my sister and her boyfriend the next day. Its kind of stressful to leave her, I know how difficult she can be, im not so sure how other people will handle it. I came home once to a screaming, red in the face baby. The second time was better. I appreciated the help, I love help!

I think all the stress has finally got to me. I had to learn how to ask for help, something I am not comfortable with doing, but I realize I have to or I will start crying. Raising a baby is very hard work! you have very little time (if any) to yourself, your friends disappear, you don't have a social life, everything is dirty, you develop this additional sense that's tuned into your child. Sometimes at night  when I'm sleeping I think I hear her crying and jump up, turns out Im just dreaming. Yes, I dream about my baby crying. You get into more arguments with your spouse (we never fought before the baby :[ ). Going to grab a Starbucks is more of a hassle then enjoyment because of all the baby gear you have to load into the car. All the responsibility is on you!

I'm reading a new book Touchpoints: Your Child's Emotional and Behavioral Development, Birth to 3 which is a lot more positive then another book which made me depressed (the other book made it seem like being a mother is the most depressing job in the world) I like it so far :)

Kiss!

Sac Trip

Its official! Baby Sora is crawling! According to Grandpa she is :) and she is FAST too! She bumped her head on the leg of our coffee table, she cried for a bit.

We've also tried feeding her baby rice cereal but she wasn't having it...I didn't think she would automatically know what to do, she mostly had most of the cereal on her face then in her mouth. She didn't spit it out, just rejects the spoon. (OMG see how her toes are hanging out in the last picture. LOL DAD never buttons her bottoms or puts her pants on after changing her diaper)



I'm getting to spend more time on my own without the baby. This month my friend Ana, who is also a police wife & mother to a 2 year old, and I went to the movies and left our babies with their dads. Dads went to have dinner together :)  We went to Oakridge and had lunch at BJ's (the guys always go there, so now it was mommy's turn!). We've also been running together, and by running I mean we've met up twice (LOL). After looking at how many calories on the stupid menu, we decided to split a small pizza. We ended up watching "The Other Guys" Im guessing its been out a while...the theater was empty besides us too =/

After the movie we called the dads to check up on them, they "forgot" diapers so Ana and I cut our day short, went to Target to buy diapers and went home. The sight of those two with our babies was RIDICULOUS!! Sora (again) was not wearing PANTS, she had dirtied the ones she was wearing (barely), the best part was...dad thinking there wasn't any more diapers in the bag, decided to fold paper towels from the mens' restroom and "plug the leakage" in her diaper.

(haha as Im typing, she just farted and looked at me and smiled.)

I got a new haircut! I chopped a lot of inches off and had a Brazilian blow dry...OMG the treatment saved my self esteem! My hair isn't kinky or frizzy :) I timed myself how long it takes to blowdry and flat iron my hair....a whole SEVEN mintues.. oooo eeeiiiii. Sora also has discovered my hair and likes running her fingers through it, grabbing a handful and yanking it! She thinks my hair must make noise. I'm started to feel more like myself on the outside....I squeezed into the smallest sized jeans I have..James and I squeezed, sucked in, pulled everything together so they could close. It was not pretty, but I got my muffin top into them...my stretch marks are also fading weeee!!!

zomg!

OMG everywhere I go someone is always saying what a 'cute' baby Sora is and talks to us for a couple of minutes. Yesterday at Starbucks a lady told me to "have more babies because Sora is so adorable". lol

But then at night around bedtime, she was laying on her back babbling away so I went in for a kiss....and she spit up...in my mouth! I was horrified! Um. so what does one do in that situation!? Cry on the inside

*tear*